STARCHASER – THE LEGEND O

STARCHASER – THE LEGEND OF ORIN: A curious relic of the ‘80s 3D fad which included new installments in the Jaws and Amityville franchises, at the very least Starchaser can claim bragging rights as the first animated 3D release. Everything else about the story of an escaped slave boy who hitches a ride with a smuggler to help the rebellion on his home planet with the help of an “invisible saber” is embarrassingly derivative. Still, it manages to more true to its pulp sci-fi inspirations than the self-important Star Wars prequels, and even comes with a Casio composed videogame soundtrack that will have you pulling out the Atari joystick from pure instinct. Trapped between the adult themes of Heavy Metal and the pure kid flicks from Disney, Starchaser manages to introduce some memorable images amidst the confusion – like a tribe of decomposing cyborgs hungry from human parts and a programmable “fembot” that really pushes the PG rating. No extras are included on MGM’s release but consider yourself lucky this oddity is available it all, and with a great looking anamorphic transfer to boot. DANGER: DIABOLIK: As any actor will tell you, masked superheroes are tough to pull off. Behind that veil of spandex it’s next to impossible to emote like a true thespian. But John Phillip Law not only succeeds as Diabolik, a master thief who lives the James Bond lifestyle without all those annoying scruples and government bureaucrats, he truly comes alive whenever he pulls down the mask to highlight his arched eyebrows and devastatingly intense glare. The first counter-culture anti-hero, Diabolik was based on a series of “fumetti,” Italian comic books, which found the titular character stealing everything from priceless necklaces to 20-ton gold nuggets. Director Mario Bava carries over the supersatured color scheme and clever effects work from his earlier horror films to create a singularly unique blend of espionage, adventure and high camp. The scenes inside Diabolik’s cavernous hideout trick the eye into believing the film was shot on twice its actual budget. Paramount has included a 20-minute retrospective, From Fumetti to Film, an priceless commentary with Law and Bava biographer Tim Lucas (editor of Video Watchdog), along with the Beastie Boys video “Body Movin’,” which used cut scenes from the film extensively to recreate that swinging ‘60s spy look. Great little package! THE FLICK: There’s football films - the ones that try to get it right, try to take you into the locker room, onto the field and into the players heads - films like Friday Night Lights, Any Given Sunday and North Dallas Forty. Then there’s The Longest Yard, which on its surface doesn’t seem to take the sport or itself very seriously. Based around the idea of an ex-NFL superstar (Burt Reynolds) heading up a team of convicts against a superior squad of semi-pro guards, the film should have ended up as nothing more than an amusing popcorn flick (which is exactly what the 2005 remake ended up to be). But there’s something inherent in director Robert Aldrich’s film that encapsulates the very essence of football, that not only explains why we root for the underdog but how he got to be such a mangy, no-good mutt in the first place. Reynolds never found a more suitable role for his particular talents than Paul Crewe, a man who viciously slaps a woman to the floor in the first few moments of the film but has the entire audience cheering for him by the time the credits role. And Tracy Keenan Wynn’s screenplay wastes no time getting to the good stuff, as Crewe reluctantly handpicks his team from a variety of muscle-bound murderers and mental defectives. Being the 70’s, that leaves room for racial themes and randy jokes today’s PG-13 world wouldn’t touch. This Dirty Dozen selection process introduces some familiar faces like ?, who would later cut his teeth as Jaws in the Bond films. And watch for Bernadette Peters as the horny beehive-wearing secretary. Accurate or not, The Longest Yard feels like sitting on a bench of a real team; sweaty, smelly, funny and alive. Once the grainy game film footage kicks in, the illusion is complete as Reynolds uses his arm to gain back that last yard of self-respect for himself and his teammates. To say this is the sort of movie that goes well with peanuts and beer is an understatement. But it also serves as an education for anyone who wants to know what the game is all about. THE FEATURES: The highlight of this “Lockdown Edition” is a two-part retrospective that covers all the who, what, where and whys of the production, mostly from Reynolds himself and producer Albert Ruddy. It totals around 20-minutes and chats up the guys about the real-life NFL players involved in the game and director Aldrich’s insistence that everyone play it rough n’ tough. Reynolds and Ruddy return for a full-length commentary that makes for a nice conversation, equal parts reminiscences and production facts. Plus there’s a sneak peak at the sequel starring Adam Sandler, who’s got some big cleats to fill this time around.