piranha 3DD

As you can tell from the title, there’s nothing subtle about Piranha 3DD. That’s “double-D” like the bra size, in case the humor was too sophisticated for you. A quick cash-in on the relatively successful (and equally offensive) 2010 remake whose most memorable moment was the amputation of Jerry O’Connell’s own member, director John Gulager (Feast) does his best to mix SyFy Channel corniness with Cinemax-style skin.

This time around, it’s an “adults-only” waterpark that is invaded by the prehistoric piranha who, according to guest-star Christopher Lloyd, are evolving quickly to withstand chlorinated water and perhaps even life on land (foreshadowing an obvious sequel). The leaves a smart but sexy marine biologist (Danielle Panabaker) and a nerdy waterpark worker (Matt Bush) the only thing standing between a day of family fun and a skinny-dipping massacre!

Piranha 3DD is a joke from start to finish. You can laugh with it or at it…but either way those with a suitably sick sense of humor are bound to find some amusement. It’s a film designed for a theater full of like-minded individuals who get satisfaction out of watching Gary Busey poke a flatulent cow, or David Hasselhoff mock his slow-motion Baywatch run – again! Although the Hoff does get the most honest and self-reflexive line of dialogue in the film when he arrives to the grand opening as the waterpark’s guest lifeguard: “Welcome to rock-bottom.”

Too true, Hoff. Too true.

Anchor Bay’s Blu-ray combo pack includes three discs (DVD, Blu-ray and 3D Blu-ray…which might amp up your enjoyment if you’ve got the capability) along with a digital copy and a wide selection of equally goofy extras like Busey’s Bloopers and the Hofftastic World of David Hasselhoff.