manos

“They were so preoccupied with whether or not they could, that they didn’t stop to think if they should.” - Dr. Ian Malcolm (Jeff Goldblum) from Jurassic Park

While re-mastering Manos: The Hands of Fate (1966) for high-definition doesn’t have the same potential for catastrophe as cloning dinosaurs, the quote is still an apt headline for what surely must be the most unexpected Blu-ray ever. Funded in part by a Kickstarter campaign, this cleaned up version of the Mystery Science Theater 3000 classic (sans robots) presents the best possible version of what many people consider the worst movie of all time.

For those unfamiliar with the film, a plot description may make it sound like a relatively routine horror quickie. Rest assured, it’s not. Taking the wrong turn on their family vacation, Michael, Margaret and little Debbie wind up spending the night with Torgo, the creepy caretaker of a ramshackle home on the edge of the desert. Torgo insists that “The Master” – whose portrait complete with a leashed devil dog hangs in the front room - doesn’t like visitors. And eventually, The Master arrives, along with his troupe of bickering brides, with the intention of adding another trophy wife to his stable.

Just what the Master’s purpose is or which evil god he prays to is never made clear. But that’s small potatoes in a movie that is so inept on every level that character motivation is the very least of its problems. Allegedly inspired by a bet between director/writer/star Harold P. Warren and famed Hollywood screenwriter Sterling Silliphant, Manos starts slow, confused and clumsy, with shots that ramble on minutes longer than they should or end abruptly without warning. Compounding the home movie quality is a cast that appears completely unaware of what is supposed to be happening onscreen (in actor John “Torgo” Reynolds case, mind altering substances were supposedly to blame). And post-production dubbing adds an entirely new level of ridiculousness to the already comical proceedings.

Of course, that’s exactly what earned Manos its legendary status. Few movies are as ready-made for mockery as this; which makes it difficult to sit through as an actual movie. While Synapse Films new special edition offers up a visually enhanced version of the film (as well as a “grindhouse” unaltered copy for comparison’s sake), it’s hard to imagine enjoying it to appreciate Warren’s (cough, cough) artistry. Using a 2K restoration that amps up the color and brightness – several close-ups look remarkably clear and detailed – Manos is still a gritty, grainy affair. Even today’s technology can only accomplish so much.

It’s the disc’s special features that really make this one worth a purchase, namely the 30-minute Hands: The Fate of Manos featurette, which includes cast and crew interviews to help tell the crazy production history behind Warren’s pet project. From the sleazy “casting sessions” all the way up to the embarrassing red carpet premiere in Texas, bad movies always seem to have the more interesting backstories…and Manos is no exception.

The extras continue with another interesting feature about the restoration itself and a wacky side-story on a puppet adaptation of the film. If one is up for actually watching the main feature twice there’s an audio commentary featuring several cast members, including the “master” himself, Tom Neyman.